We all dream, some more than others. Some have dreams of helping themselves and some have dreams of helping others, neither are bad. But, whatever your dream, sometimes your heart-call can hit a snag.
Your circumstances are very different to what you’d hoped for. Your funding got delayed or cancelled. Your board just ruled against you. You don’t speak the language, but need to resolve something quickly. You sank every penny into your dream and you’ve just lost it all.
It happens. We think we’ve got it all planned and yet, we feel like we’ve fallen short just when we need the universe to back us.
It can be really frustrating when things go wrong, but that frustrated thinking is just an alarm bell that you’ve separated yourself from the source of insight and wisdom. We all do this from time to time. We feel that everything is personal and aimed at thwarting our big call, yet it’s not. It’s just a story we are telling ourselves because it seems easier to accept this projected reality, than face the actual reality.
Here’s some practical things you can do to get back on track:
1. Breathe! When we need to face into the reality of something, especially if it’s a realisation that we are in our own way, the ego wants to point at everything other than ourselves. Realising that your feelings are coming from within you, because that’s the only way it works, can be unsettling and we want to pull away. Breathing into a realisation helps you maintain a sense of calm and quietens the ego to allow you see what you’ve been missing.
2. Relax into not knowing. When we stop searching for that elusive answer we create capacity for fresh new thinking. Topping up an already full cup will cause it to overflow. Emptying the cup a little creates space for something new. Relaxing into not knowing takes you out of the fight and allows you to create capacity. It’s remarkable the insights you can have when you surrender.
3. Pray. Whether your a person of faith or not, praying has the effect of taking your attention off yourself and allowing wisdom to flow through you, rather than you needing to be wisdom. Knowing you are not alone, but connected to God, the source of life, is both empowering and humbling. Try it. It might be just what you need.
4. Stay in the game. When in doubt keep doing what makes sense to you until it no longer makes sense, unless of course your action is destructive to you or others. Come from love and allow your innate qualities to show up and reveal the creativity that has always been in you. Now you might think staying in the game is the opposite of surrender, but it’s not. Imagine you are stranded on an island and you’re preoccupied with escaping. Surrendering to not knowing how to escape whilst preparing to survive is an example of staying in the game.
5. Calibrate. Taking time to notice your feelings and zooming out from the action can provide a more expansive view. Seeing where you’re missing something can be insightful and elevating. When you are clearer about yourself, try calibrating others who are in the mix. How are they seeing things?
Remember, whilst your circumstances may feel personal, try to see that they are universal and neutral. The only power they have is that which you give them.
Big Love. Matt.